16 September 2007

SAM'S RANDOM THOUGHTS

Every once in a while our friend Sam checks in with random musings. Here goes.

  • Did Willy Mac just get runner up on Last Comic Standing? And I know the show is not over, but no one is going to beat that fat funny black guy, it’s against the laws of physics.

Willy Mac bears an uncanny resemblance to the Hemi guy, John Reep.


  • I heard that in NASCAR, sometimes a crew chief will put an easily found infraction in their car to hide a much larger one. So, that makes me wonder what the New England Patriots are up to. They got caught with this defensive sign stealing scandal, so what are they really hiding? And I think I figured it out. Has anyone noticed how perfect Tom Brady is? He has three Super bowl rings, bangs hot ass models, impregnates hot ass actresses, and is a really damn good quarterback. Which all leads to direct evidence that he is……..a robot!!!!!

........from the future!!!!!!!.........and from another planet!!!!!!!.........but still from the future!!!!!!!

  • Guess what, Vick did it, he pled guilty and if you still think he didn’t, then you are ignorant. I’m looking at you, Mexicans.


  • How is watching a bunch of rednecks and a fairy turn left for 3 to 4 hours exciting? Frankly, it’s sad.


  • I’ve come to realize that I probably will not make it to an old age and will kick the bucket at a young age, roughly 34.7 years of age. And I have figured out the possible ways I’m going to die and the chance I do die in that manner:

    • 4% - Stabbed by a hobo
    • 3% - Too much sex (and yes, that is an oxymoron)
    • 2% - Stabbed by Chili
    • 1% - Clemson v. Cocks bar fight in which I get stabbed
    • 90% - Die in a horrible car crash that involves my car flipping seven times, exploding four times, there will be a Battle Royale between a T-Rex, a helicopter, and a tornado on that road, somewhere a lobster with only one claw rubber banded will be let loose in a kiddy pool, and two Cocks’ fans will receive a good ol’ fashioned alien anal probe in Columbia.

  • If you ever want to waste large amounts of time reading articles about such things as the “12 Video Games with Ridiculous Premises” or “8 Important Lessons Learned from 80’s Cartoons”, then you must go to Cracked.com right now!!!!! (well, after you finish reading everything on this site)