LEGGETT ISSUES STATEMENT ON FIRE

On behalf of my wife Karen and myself, we would like to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers during this difficult time. The magnitude of outpouring of support means a great deal to my family. We sincerely appreciate everyone's understanding of our need for privacy at this time. In the upcoming days and weeks, we will be working to establish a fund to aid a fire-related cause. Further information will be forthcoming.

Again, our sincere thanks and gratitude,

Jack Leggett

Also, when he states that they will be establishing a fund to aid fire related acidents, he's speaking of helping others. I find this very respectable of Leggett, especially in his own time of crisis.

STEVE'S SCHEDULING SHENANIGANS

Grrr! We're tough by proxy!

A reader pointed out to us that Roy Philpott at the great CUTigers.com has taken on Spurrier's spouting off about schedules in his recent article titled "Fun with Schedules." By Philpott's estimation, SC would go 6-4-1 against Clemson's schedule (the tie being a theoretical dead heat with Virginia) and the Tigers would finish 8-3 against the Gamecock's foes. The Tigers, as they tend to do, take the season finale versus Sakerlina. Philpott is correct in saying that it all boils down to talent. The Gamecocks have a stout defense this year with some players any team would be glad to have. Clemson, on the other hand, has one of the most explosive offensive talent pools in the nation, the OL of course being the question mark. Spurrier can try and spin this thing however he likes, but the Tigers are better regardless of the competition.

UNDER STEVE'S SKIN

Yes, I'm aware that's not the proper Clemson paw in the background. Blame the LSU Photoshopper, not me.

We try not to dwell on Sakerlina too much outside of the occasional police report or during the week of the game. I've seen a couple of the SC blogs out there and it seems every 2nd or 3rd post is taking swipes at the Tigers. Seeing as we don't harbor a staggering inferiority complex like the chickens, we like to think we're above that. Of course we're not above highlighting some of the delightful quips spewed from the mouth of Steve Spurrier in a recent news article.

Spurrier has said in the past that "We will never lose to Clemson again." So much for that, unless you count moral victories, which most Sakerlina fans do.

He's also stated "I don't talk about Clemson." Right, right....

In a recent peice in the Raleigh News & Observer, Spurrier is quoted as saying "I wish one of the sports writers, when they start picking everybody's record this year, would write how they'd do if Clemson played South Carolina's schedule and South Carolina played Clemson's schedule." Perhaps, Steve, the reason they don't do this is because such retarded speculation is the realm of messageboard dwelling mouthbreathers. Clemson doesn't play SC's schedule, nor does SC play Clemson's. The media, albeit less frequently these days, tends to deal in realities, not the sort of whining speculation a revered coach reverts to when he can't succeed in-state. I'll absolutely agree that SC has a more difficult schedule than does Clemson. Them's the breaks, as they say. Tough shit. Having a tougher schedule does not make your team better. The results of Clemson-SC games during the brief time SC has been clinging to the leg of the big bad SEC should prove that.

As someone pointed out, this is further evidence that Spurrier is just becoming one of them. He once spoke of championships and bringing glory to SC and now he just complains about Clemson and the tough SEC schedule. Steve Spurrier... more like Steve Worrier amirite!?!?!? LOLOLOLOLOL!!!1!!!!1!

Spurrier followed up his quote with "But anyway, that's the way it is. There's no big deal about it." This is interesting to me because it fits a pattern in his shit talking. See, men talk and don't back down. Women and guys who wear visors outside of their acceptable areas (tennis courts, golf courses, old timey poker tables) deal in the passive-aggressive. Say something brash, then temper it with a half-retraction and dismiss it as inconsequential. Look at some of his more bitchy quotes over time and you'll usually see a half-assed retraction after the fact.

It appears that, though only 2-1 against Spurrier, with Clemson seeming to gain some momentum in recruiting and in the polls, Tommy Bowden and the Tigers are getting under Steve's skin. This should be fun to watch as it plays out.

LEGGETT'S HOUSE DESTROYED BY FIRE

Just a quick note to let you know that Clemson Baseball Coach Jack Leggett lost his house in a fire yesterday. Check out the news blotter from WYFF here. We'll keep you updated on the situation. Condolences to the Leggett's and thankfully nobody was hurt.

UNDAUNTED COURAGE: THE SEMI-FICTICIOUS EPIC THAT IS PETER LALICH'S LIFE

Peter Lalich is a man among men. A mountain bear of a man with a football as a chew toy and a neolithic stone arm from outer space. But no, Lalich wasn't just born into greatness. He had to hit the baptismal fire of life head on in a crazy windmill fashion that only he could pull off with awkward smoothness. Perhaps you have already seen his AMAZING WIKIPEDIA ENTRY. If you haven't seen it, this is unacceptable. Fortunately, I'm here to not only provide you with a link to the article but to also to fill in the gaps that were left out. This is the amazing (semi) true story of one Master Peter Lalich navigated by yours truly with the assistance of a few facebook pictures (thank you public domain laws!)...

Peter Lalich: Harder than galvanized steel... forged in Springfield, Virginia

Young Peter was born on May 18th, 1988 to... uh... Peter Lalich who then subsequently... uh, named his son... Peter... after "Pistol" Pete Maravich. Ipso facto, Peter Lalich is a reincarnation of Pete Maravich but with a penchant for football, not basketball. He then grew up and did some rather insignificant stuff until the day he picked up his first football and threw it into the next neighborhood. Unfortunately for Peter, athleticism can't buy you friends at such an early age and he remained in a secluded sect of youngsters that is usually dominated by tall, goofy kids that nervously interact as little as possible with peers. Life was hard for Peter in Pop Warner, little did he know that life was only about the get much harder.

Lalich, like his hero Jack Lambert, was accustomed to losing teeth in his early football years due to his vicious and often raucous style of play.

The mental toughness that would later show in his UVA years was constructed in searing heat as well as hurricane type storms under thundering skies while practicing and learning from Coach van Gouda at Springfield Middle School. Most of his toughness, as one might assume occurred on the field, actually came from what happened between bells during school. Teenage years can be harsh on a youth, but due to Peter being the "tall, ugly, goofy kid," puberty took it's toll twice as hard on him. At lunch he was relegated to sitting by himself or sitting with the kids that were a hodgepodgery of cracking voices, pimples, and dorkishness. Lalich decided to walk the lonely road... furthering his journey down a war beaten path.

Next came high school. Still no friends. Still no girls. Still a big ug. Peter experimented with Puka shell necklaces, neon green hat/pink shirt combos, feuax burberry sweaters pulled low, and taking pictures with his arms crossed and his greasy bangs pulled into his face. It can't really be explained in mere words. Thus, the photo journal:





It kinda makes me miss high school myself. Things changed however. Peter got a letter telling him he's got a full ride to UVA. Given natural high school social dictation, within minutes he's got everything he could ever want. Parties, chicks, etc. It doesn't matter that he's one ugly mother now. All of that goes away when ya sign with the Wahoos. Especially when you're buried on the depth chart. That's where the real action is. Simply put, Peter Lalich is the fucking man. He's the Bomb.com. Seriously.

In fact, you should friend him on facebook, immediately. The reasoning behind this is the fact that he gives almost daily inspiration in his status updates ranging from statements like "Peter... snow so white, only thing missin is 7 dwarfs" and "Peter... str8 like arm hair." I teared up when I read " Peter... I just do my pete and everytime i speak my sentences are complete LOLOLOLOL."

More so, Peter Lalich knows people. Want tickets to that Skid Row concert minutes before the show? No worries, Peter already has someone stuffing your tickets AND backstage passes in Will Call as we speak. He's got you front and back. You wanna roll with Peter to lunch? Sure thing. He'll just pick up his Kia Sorrento that the dealership lends him and be on his way over. Onward to lunch as you're further impressed that EVERYONE KNOWS PETER. Even the people at Moe's shout to him as he enters! Peter Lalich is a Campus Legend. In fact, he coined the phrase and sent it along to the NCAA football game developers, via e-mail... on his Blackberry. Stunningly, he's so amazing that he even lists Rivals.com as his personal website on facebook!

What's that? You want some beer? Oh he's got you covered man. He's got a fake that can get him in anywhere in town. No problem. Most of the times he just skips the line and goes right in without waiting or getting carded! You know why? Cause he's on the fucking football team... that's why. Just let him go in this seedy gas station and get it for you... He'll be back in two seconds with a case of warm Natty Ice that we can shotgun. *fast forward* See dude, here you go. I told you. Peter is the man. He can... dude, you've got a cop behind you and he's pulling you over. Shit. Dude, our parents are gonna be so pissed. Turns out Peter isn't the man. He's just some strange looking dude who gets drunk, shows up to your party uninvited, gropes the girls at your party, drinks your beer and eats all of your food in the fridge, passes out in a puddle of his own vomit in your front yard, and hopefully... maybe one day he might be lucky enough to have a bad acid trip and go nuts in the middle of your neighborhood street. Ah, the life of a struggling back up quarterback. This is where it begins, Peter. Please stay the course because personally, I enjoy a long drawn out downfall.

THURSDEE NEWS

MONEY MONEY MONEY DRANKIN DRANKIN DRANKIN

SI reports that Clemson and Alabama will receive nearly $2 million each for the season opener in the Georgia Dome. More importantly, beer will be sold until halftime. BEER WILL BE SOLD AT A CLEMSON GAME. EGADS.

So what will happen when the unsuspecting fan discovers he can instantly kick the action up a notch at the Dome? I like to think it'll go a little something (pause) like this:

[scene: concession stand, Georgia Dome, Aug 30, 2008]

Alabama fan: "Good sir, let me get 8 Chick-fil-A sammiches, a trash bag full of waffle fries doused in polynesian sauce, uh, and a bushel of nuggets. And take my fanny pack and fill it with honey-mustard. I also require a tankard of your finest lemonade."

Concession boy: "Ah, yes, the medium sized Friedgen Meal. Sir, we also are selling beer until halftime today."

Bamafan: (incredulous) "Wait, what the fuck did you just say to me?"

Concession boy: (takes a step back) "Uh... I said we also have beer."

Bamfan: (squinting) "Toying with my alcoholism is like toying with my emotions, Poppa Smurf. This is a college football game, we do our binge drinking before, not during."

Concession boy: "But sir, it's only 8 dollars per 16 oz cup."

Bmfin: (salivating) "Are the cups.... *gulp* are the cups flimsy?"

Concession boy: "So flimsy you can barely hold onto them."

Brmfrrn: (lip trembles) "Please tell me the beer is.. oh God.. lukewarm and watered down."

Concessions: "Indeed. Sir it's really only beer in name alone."

Brmfnnnn: SMASH GRAB DRINK PUNCH VOMIT PUNCH DRINK DRINK YELL DRINK GROPE DRINK *ding* Halftime *ding* APOLOGIZE

Much like SNL writers I don't know how to end a bit. END.

Just pour the beer into this carrying bag on a pole. No, it's not an IV drip. Do IV poles come painted crimson? Didn't think so, bub.

ACC SPORTSWRITERS HEART CLEMSON

Clemson was picked by 51 of 65 ACC media types to win the ACC Championship. 59 out of 65 picked the Tigers to win their division. 5 media members tabbed Wake to win the division. This was the first time since 1991 that the Tigers were chosen to win the league. Clemson, of course, clenched their last league crown in 1991. SPOOOOKY. The State talks about it here.

Pasty manchild and Varsity hot-dog distributor Stewart Mandel is one of the writers who picked Clemson, albiet with some strong reservations.

STACKED OFFENSE

Cullen Harper, James Davis, and CJ Spiller led preseason player of the year voting and join Aaron Kelly and Michael Hamlin on the preseason all-ACC team. The article in The State goes on to note that Coach Bowden may be prepared to move man-beast Rendrick Taylor back to WR after getting some work in the backfield.

INJURY REPORTS

The ACC will become the first CFB conference to release regular injury reports. Twice weekly, baby.

MUSTACHE RULES UPDATE

Yeah, so… I had top change a few of the rules to the competition. I got rid of the whole “having to wear a mustache for a month” partly due to my graduation on August 9th and a few people were bitching about not only wearing it but having it for the Bama game which I can understand. That’s my fault for the scheduling. So, the new deadline is August 29th. You can check the revised rules below. Also, Chili and I will judge but your input in the judging will be taken and is appreciated. Sorry again for the mid-season shafting, but, get over it.

Revised Rules:

1.) Shaving commences the morning of June 6th. Pictures of your shaved facial hair must be emailed to dannyfordisgod -at- gmail -dot- com. You don’t even have to shave that morning, just some time that day send me a pic of your jaw area etc.

2.) Growing of mustaches shall last until August 29th. Shaving of said mustache before the given date results in a disaqualification and a good ribbing. Pictures of your mustaches must be sent in to the same email address with proof of date on August 29th. (Proof of date will be a password we give you the day of and you can put it on a sticky note and hold it up in your picture. Make sure we can see the sticky note and your mustache clearly.)

3.) Each grower may choose their own facial hair growing pattern for the entirety of the competition.

4.) Winner will be determined by style, creativity, and effectiveness of the mustache by Chili and I using a scale of one to ten starting on August 29th, 2008 and no later than September 5, 2008.

5.) Any style of mustache is accepted. Examples are as follows: Cooter, Hitler (if you so choose), Handlebar, Pushbroom/Earnhardt Sr., Triple H Handlebar, The Captain James T Hook, etc. Pencil thin mustaches do not count.

6.) If there are any problems, DFIG reserves the right to hold an emergency meeting of parliament and make decisions based on what’s best for our site.

VOTE FOR CLEMSON!!!

Vote for Clemson in the ESPN helmet clash. On a serious note, ESPN needs to stop with these pointless competitions. But seriously, go vote.

Oh yeah, and as of 8pm tonight... 38 MORE DAYS

PERTINENT NOTES & NEWSIFICATION

- The Sporting Gnomes stumbled upon an article stating that the coaching staff is thinking about redshirting Rendrick Taylor (who is now a senior) so that he can get better acquainted with the runningback position he was moved to during the spring. Another main reason for the debate is that they also want to get Andre Ellington and Jamie Harper some experience as true freshmen.

- I've been getting a lot of questions and comments from friends, readers, etc. about the season ticketing and all the hullabaloo of the new seating plan. IPTAY released two major updates of information on the matter. The first was just a general Seat Equity Plan update and the latter was an update concerning the parking issues for next year.

- Cullen Harper has been put on the preseason 2008 Davey O'Brien QB Award watch list as per the article listed on the CUAD website. As you know, ESPN pulled a little trick last year that most like to call "biased journalism" as they practically ran the Heisman campaign push for Matt Ryan, the dark horse QB candidate out of Boston College even though statistically Harper was as good as Ryan, arguably holding better numbers in more categories given the different styles of offense each respective QB played in (Ok, ok, that comeback at Virginia Tech was ridiculous, but facts are facts.) There are others who speculate that Harper could be a dark horse as well. Unfortunately, as always dark horses are just that... and they never win.

- The WestZone phase II is well underway and IPTAY has been nice enough to set up a webcam for the construction site that you can find here. All kinds of options from live streaming down to refreshing every two minutes. Construction will continue through the season but shouldn't hamper any parking or pedestrian traffic. The CUAD states, "Phase II of the WestZone will include the coaches' offices, new strength and conditioning area, administrative offices, a large team room and expanded equipment room. This component of the WestZone will enable the football staff and support personnel to relocate into the WestZone and free up valuable space in McFadden for our Olympic Sports. Phase II will make a profound impact on our Total Sports Program, as the WestZone will be beneficial not only to football but to the entire department. "

- Cortney Vincent to transfer to Tarleton State after being dismissed for several reasons. Can you say DII Preseason All-American?

- I've been getting anxious about the upcoming season. Actually, I've been getting anxious about thinking about getting excited about the upcoming schedule... in the future... at a later date... on which I'm sure that my stomach will hurt. With that, I've found the 2008 Clemson Schedule widget for the Mac. Couldn't find anything for vista that didn't look completely sketched out. I did however go online and work out a pitiful little "counter until the kickoff of the Clemson/Bama game in Atlanta" that looks as if your mom or dad forwarded it to you (as well as everyone else in their address book, judging from the header) in an e-mail. Enjoy. I'm also gonna tinker with an html countdown for the sidebar if I can get one that looks good enough, but don't hold your breath.

42 MORE DAYS

DR. I.M. IBRAHIM PASSES

Condolences to the family and friends of Dr. I.M. Ibrahim as he passed this past Saturday. Read the Tigernet write up on him. Good man. Good Clemson man. Dr. I. originally convinced then Clemson Athletic Director Frank Howard to allow soccer to be a varsity sport. He became one of the winningest soccer coaches in the country by winning two national championships and 11 conference championships. He also owned The Tiger Sports shop and The Athletic Department stores. Lastly, he was also a fellow blogger with a Clemson flavor. Again, condolences.

BOOBIES AND ASSAULT RIFLES

So, I'm embracing the territory, culture, and lifestyle around me known as the Simpsonville area and I am going to purchase a second gun. Chili and I were discussing and I've narrowed my selection down to the SIG 9mm or an AR-15 made by either Colt, Rock River, Bushmaster, or again a SIG (even though it's slightly different). I just happened to throw a few related search terms into youtube and this is what came up. Enjoy.

THURSDAY NEWSAPALOOZA

ESPN has their Insider preview of Clemson available for free here. Go check it out. They rate Clemson as far and away the most talented Atlantic Division team and Cullen Harper, James Davis, and Aaron Kelly as the best in the conference in their respective positions. ESPN also notes that the linebackers and offensive line lack depth and chemistry at this point in time. No surprise there. The preview is wrapped up in essentially the same way every other one this preseason has been; with the caveat that Clemson has been in the position to win before and failed. Nothing is a given.

Trev Alberts, whom Sprint apparently felt was so invaluable in the world of sports punditry that they needed to independently fund him like some sort of Medici family of mediocre talking head benefactors, has some nice things to say about Clemson.

TREV

WEDNESDAY NEWSGASM

ESPN's Heather Dinich has a nice writeup of Cullen Harper on her ACC blog. The post touches on Cullen's dad Jeff's national title with Georgia in 1980 and Cullen's pursuit of a title to call his own.

According to ScoresandOdds.com, Cullen is a 20-1 shot for the Heisman.

DeAndre McDaniel was not punished by the Clemson student judicial review board last week and will remain on the team for the time being. The board did, however, retain the right to revisit his situation if new evidence is provided. His future with the team remains in limbo and will largely rest on his criminal hearing later in the year. Read about it here. Coach Bowden has shown a willingness to dismiss players who have run-ins with the law. As badly as Clemson needs McDaniel, Bowden will likely stick to form and dismiss McDaniel if he is found guilty. The biggest question mark here is what Bowden will do with McDaniel until trial.

Clemson-Bama is 52 days away but Deep South Sports proves the tat battle has already begun.

Sakerlina fans have been smearing a nasty little rumor around SC and Clemson boards as well as whatever other boards they can weasel into. Some mouthbreathers are claiming that someone - fans, boosters, or even coaches - is mailing out negative information about the Gamecocks to potential recruits. O-kay. What negative mailings are those? The South Carolina media guide? The State Newspaper? Clemson needn't spread negative publicity about Sakerlina, they do a damned good job of that by themselves. Witness a fanbase so delusional they must create boogeymen and conspiracy theories to explain to themselves why they're being outrecruited by the Tigers.

Here's the Clemson version of the localized NCAA 09 commercials. Enjoy.

Buy NCAA 09! Now with new... er.. rosters.

HAPPY 232ND BIRTHDAY, AMERICA!

"There are no people on earth in whom a spirit of enthusiastic zeal is so readily kindled and burns so remarkably as among Americans." - Mercy Warren

TEH BEARDS TO BEES UPDATING, PLASE

Some of our readers in the competition have answered their call to arms and sent in their mugshots of said bearded combo. Some of them didn't... err... haven't yet sent in photos (I'm looking at you, Sambo). I, of course, obliged myself and took a bad picture of my somewhat swollen face and have never been more insecure of myself than now.

Reader SACK is going for the Belton-Honea Path Classic Cooter

DFIG reader John B. is going for a hybrid Pirate/Mexican Bouncer combo.

Look at Sambo, pretending to be literate. Hidden inside that dictionary is a copy of Swank.

Like a fine wine or cheese, Jason L's beard is aged, but sophisticated. By the way, I have a buddy who has a framed print of that shirt, awesome retro Clemson art in case you were wondering. My favorite part is the random celebrities thrown in the picture.

Eventually, I'd like to have this pan out into a ratty beard with some tendrils, then finish it off with a nice Cop Stash. Hey, I know it's not that pretty to look at, but at least I don't have mutton chops and feminine glasses like some Florida bloggers out there. Chili kindly opted out of this competition, muttering something about not getting laid with a mustache, but I submit that it's empowering and if a chick can't get with the stache, shes too uptight. Also, what the hell is up with my nostrils?

Keep sending in your pics!

NEWS AND RECOMMENDATIONS

NEWS
- RAPE!... AND BUTT FUCKING!... IN GEORGIA OF ALL PLACES! Things have been desperate on their campus for so long that someone finally snapped over at Georgia Tech. Paul Johnson suspended Jerrard Tarrant from the team indefinitely. Kind of interesting that we're kind of going through the same situation, though, this one seems pretty legit. Tarrant was contending for a starting cornerback position as a redshirt freshman coming out of spring ball.

Remember to keep it suave, even in your sexual assault mugshot.

- Four players (Spiller, Davis, Harper, and Kelly) have been named to the Maxwell watch list. Clemson joins Southern Cal and Oklahoma as the top schools with candidates on the list, each having four. Ricky Sapp and Michael Hamlin have also been named to the Bednarik preseason list as well.

-All but two Clemson freshman signees have made it to campus and enrolled in second summer session. The two men down are Xavier Brewer still needs to take a summer class back home. Jared Crittenton didn't meet our standards and was released from his LOI. He has signed with Memphis.

-Kyle Parker was named to the Freshman All-American team for being a stud with a bat. Now if only he could figure out that whole defense thing, we'd be great. I'm still predicting he never plays a down of football for Clemson.

- The Deandre McDaniel's plot thickens as the women who filed the charges against him was identified as Ms. Abra Weeks. Good thing that we're not UGA or USC or the like because her getting killed by psychotic fans right now would not help Deandre at all. Bowden plays it smart and remains mum on the situation.

- Graduate Assistant Michael Morrell has been hired on as the new director of men's basketball, replacing Josh Posterino who replaced Shaka Smart who accepted a job at Florida. Here's a run down: Morrell -> Director of Men's Basketball; Posterino -> Assistant Coach; Shaka -> Gonzo to Florida; Clemson Women's Basketball -> Could still get beat by any girl's JV high school team in the upstate.

- The US Army Corps of Engineers tells their residents of Orlando "Just chill out man, it's not a big deal. Don't worry about it..." regarding bombs that they may miss during a cleanup of a one-time bombing range from WWII turned local neighborhood.

RECOMMENDATIONS

DFIG Recommends: Firefly Sweet Tea Vodka - we're not big fans of the Firefly Muscadine Vodka. Terrible. We wouldn't recommend that to anyone. We do, however, promote the sweet nectar that they bottle named Sweet Tea Vodka. We've never tasted a better liquor drink in our lives. Here's essentially all you need to do:

- Fill one glass with your preference of cubed ice.
- Fill glass 3/4 full of Fire Fly Sweet Vodka.
- Fill rest with Minute Made lemonade.

BEST. DRINK. EVER.